Humans have searched it for thousands of years

Humans have searched it for thousands of years of their history, and they have answered it every time, even though they have never answered, the greatest, most logical, and the most ambiguous question of all existential questions!
What was there before the existence of anything? How did everything come about? What is time zero? What’s moment zero? What is nothing?
Uh, yes, we found the answer, it is a point in the sky, there far away, look at it, we studied, analyzed and understood everything that came after it, it is the beginning, dear, from which everything started whether around you or not. Rest you exhausted one.
At once, the same question unsettles, but where does the point come from?
After a few hundred years of development and progress…
Ah, we found the answer, we knew where it came from, our ancestors’ answer was wrong. It all came from a point smaller and farther from the first one. Look there, we studied, analyzed and we understood it, and it is all clear. Rest you exhausted one.
Suddenly, the same question pops in mind, but where does the smaller point come from?
After a few thousand years…
Uh, we found the crucial answer; It is a tiny atom, smaller than everything we have ever known, blown up with enormous energy, the universe was born, expanded, it would continue to expand until its energy ran out, and then it would shrink on itself and be crushed, or it would expand until it froze, and in both cases, it would die, and between birth and death, life sprung up and found its way out of chance.

And then a reckless thought jumps out, not understanding anything in physical science or its complexities. at thought of a person that has never entered a chemical laboratory, he has just finished a fat lunch, leaned on his couch indifferently, blows up all the joy of our discovery, and asks the same question, OK, but where was the atom?
-It was in the void, you feisty.

• Uh… So where did the void come from? Where did the atom come from?
  Wait!! Where did the coincidence come from?
  Before and then…
  We found the answer, God was, is, and will be, the one who created everything. Rest your mind for a long time, the search is over.

Then suddenly a maniac asks, but where did….
Shut up! You blaspheme the God who created you! There is no starting point for everything, not even an atom. These questions are beyond our ability to think. Do not keep up with scientists or philosophers. This is blaspheming! You’re a blasphemer. Crucify him, burn him, kill him!
And when the crucifixion and burning ceremonies end, one of them wakes up from his barbaric drunkenness and the ecstasy of the collective mind, and wonders ” Did you burn him because the question is outside the limits of our thinking? But how did he think of it if it was outside the limits of our thinking! Why does God give us the ability to think about a question that he does not want us to discuss?”
And another maniac adds,” God knows everything, and he gave us the ability to disobey, so why does he create us and give us this ability to disobey and then torture us for a sin that he knew we would commit before we were created? If God had asked me before he created me, whether I create you as a human with your ability to disobey, or as an angel who could not, I would have chosen the second. We would choose the second.”

But how will he ask me if he has not created me yet? It does not matter, God is able to do this, why did not he create me as an angel? What is my fault?

Gave me the ability to decide? Well, I see this only as a curse, and it is my decision to reject my ability to choose, and I am not responsible for any sin I have done any more, and I do not want it. Make me an angel unable to disobey, flying here and there in the kingdom of God between the planets and the stars, glorifying with the thanksgiving of God all my long life.
Isn’t it fair that I should be able to choose who I am? My ability to decide may end me up in heaven or hell, and I have decided that I do not want to risk it, I do not want this ability, I do not want all the pleasures of human beings, permissible or forbidden, I do not want all of them, I want to be an angel and that is my decision, so why risk a day in hell? If God had asked me what I wanted to be, I would have answered that I wanted to be an angel, not a human being.

Wait…
The choice? The decision? Has God blessed me with the ability to not disobey him before! In a previous life maybe? And there were things I did that made my current life a pre-painted painting? But what happened there? And how did it get here? What did I do that I was punished for being able to disobey the Creator?

-Crucify the second, the third, the fourth, and the tenth… Burn them, these questions are forbidden to you, they will lead you to madness, or ungodliness.

But have we ever been allowed to think about questions until we find the answers? has anybody ever found the answers, and become blasphemous? We always try to make a question a religious one so we don’t have to answer it. The answers are different as we each follow our own religion, the convictions are different, no convincing answer, no answer at all…

-Stop with these existential questions that are one of the painful stages of psychological imbalance! Stop this intellectual chaos!

-Intellectual chaos is when you do not know the answer to these questions, and why did you say chaos?! Did not God arrange everything in his infinite kingdom? And my thoughts are part of this whole? Then how do you call it chaos?

After a while, and thousands of crucifixions and burning ceremonies, everyone is silent, the pain is unbearable, these sensory cells torment us, they enslave us. If my mind had stopped processing or responding to them, or simply ignoring their nerve signals, I would not have been afraid of the consequences, and I would not have stopped searching for the answer.
Pain? Why hasn’t the mind learned to control it over thousands of years of evolution! This mind is in this body, the most complex of the known system failed to find a simple, a very simple, mechanism to control the process of transmitting nerve signals, to make it less painful when needed.
Could the mind really not find it? Or was he premeditated? Is it programmed to make us fear pain? Does pain define boundaries that we cannot cross because of our fear of retribution or pain? Does it not come from within? Has God given us the ability to disobey and to feel the pain to make a balance?

Congratulations, we have just discovered your origins!
Congratulations to you, smartest monkeys!
No, we have proved nothing, but this heresy deserves to be a theorem, not even close, but it deserves prizes! First and foremost, we have to find answers and theories that satisfy your marginal lust even if it is unbelievable.
You retarded religious reactionaries! You made up the idea of God out of your brain, how do you deny your origins, without DNA, without that lightning strike, without luck and chance, you would not exist.

-Okay, Sir, but excuse me, where did that strike of lightning come from?

Stick to this introduction before the first chapter, I’ll get you straight to the end, an end before the beginning, a golden opportunity, perhaps you could spare yourself the trouble of continuing to read the story of a bunch of confused and psychopathic heroes, but before you decide to stop, that’s probably what your mind will encourage, or perhaps dictate your body to secrete some distress hormones or something like that, why not? Doesn’t he control your whole body? Think for a moment, what if…
What if my mind is my worst enemy?