Chapter XIV. Hatshepsut, The Doting

-Will he be gone for how long?

-He stated he will finish his work in two weeks or so, go see his brother Mahmoud, and then return, how I miss him.

Zeinab sits in front of the mirror in her bedroom as Hatshepsut round her: two whole weeks! What will happen to us, oh no?

-Hatshepsut, stop; I won’t let you; Hassan loves me, and I love him; don’t enrage me.

-Damn him, what a stallion. Don’t you notice his tight muscles? His huge body? His face as round as the moon, brown shining brightly, oh how I wish him.

Angrily she replied: I said stop this nonsense, I don’t want to hear anything like this again, I will not betray Hassan, I am not like you, if you want that servant, then it’s okay, find yourself the body of a servant, settle in it, and do whatever you want.

Hatshepsut laughed: You are stupid, Zeinab, and what will happen to you if I leave you?

-I’ll be happy with my husband, I’m sure of that.

She put her hands on her waist and groaned: Now you don’t need me anymore? Without me, the fire of the oven would have eaten you long ago. Without me, Hassan would not have married you, and you would have remained just a servant in this palace.

He would have married a close relative of his cousins. I taught you how to make him like a ring on your finger. I turned you out to the lady of the palace. I taught you how to buy off the people and win their loyalty until you become like a queen in all of Assiut.

Zainab: I don’t deny this, and I don’t want any separation between you and me, but kindly understand that I am committed to everything you ask. I treat everyone as you ask, even him, who feels hurt and insulted. I never leave you any orders or advice. But what you are referring to will not happen, I am very serious, I will not betray my husband, I will not betray him no matter how hard you try, even if it is necessary to separate you and me.

-I’ve repeatedly informed you that this is being done not to lose him, to insult him sometimes, and to compensate him a lot after that.

He must be made to live in a state of confusion between the woman he seeks and the mighty woman he wants to avoid.

Not only him, she added, but all humans are also the same.

Zainab, in a serious, stern, angry tone: I did not object, I did everything you said, but I will not do treason, and I do not want to hear you refer to it again. The conversation ended over this.

She advanced towards her, approaching her body, their heads close together, each looking at the other in the mirror.

Hatshepsut: Look carefully, Zeinab, your face, your body, your charms, it is not you, but I am the one who increased your attractiveness. If I left this body, you would return to that ugly girl. Remember this well.

In a firm voice, she replied: There is no need for this conversation. There is no disagreement between you and me. Stop trying to betray Hassan. This is all I ask you for.

She continued in a self-assured manner: “After all, he had married Zainab and not Hatshepsut.” Please believe me when I say that he would welcome Zainab back in her any state.

Then with a sly look and smile: My friend, the beauty of a woman is not in her face, but in her mind and what she can do; someone told me this one day.

-Who said that I don’t love Hassan? I dance all night for him, and I comply with all of his requests because I want to please him. Why do I do this, Zainab? She turned her back on him and said submissively while raising her hands in the air. Since I also adore him.

-Well, then, you have to stop thinking about his betrayal, as love and betrayal do not mix.

-What are we going to do for two weeks?!

-We’ll wait for his return. How about we change something in the room’s decor, the curtains in a new color, perhaps? Teach me a new dance, things I have never done for him before. He will come back to miss me. He must be compensated for this absence.

-It’s fine, let’s agree, and I won’t worry about it again. However, when he comes back, and we’re in bed, you’ll let me do whatever I want; don’t resist me or restrain me.

-It hurts, though, and I can’t even picture doing it. He perceives it as homosexuality and doesn’t want it that way.

-Just let me do it once; you’ll get used to it, enjoy it, and order it. Leave Hasan’s desires to me, my love, she said with a sneaky glance.

For a year following that, more than one disagreement arose between Zeinab and Hatshepsut on various issues, but they always agreed on compromise solutions, but one issue, the dispute over which has existed for months, Hassan’s desire to have children, yet, for some reason, Hatshepsut refuses that, she sees the time as early: “We are not ready for this, one child will turn our lives upside down, we are happy, we live the life of kings, why children! Let’s wait a while.”

All her arguments are not convincing, as the child will not change their lives in anything, but rather will increase their joy and happiness.

It won’t keep them busy because there are so many servants around them, but Hatshepsut insists, and she declines for an undisclosed reason.

Zainab: Speak! What is the reason?

-You are not ready to have a baby; trust me, you must choose the right time to have a baby who looks like you!

-Looks like me?! What is the problem if he looks like Hassan?

She stammered something she was hiding; she didn’t want to reveal, she said: I don’t mean that understand me, you’re just not ready.

-What nonsense are you talking about?! Not logical, not acceptable.

She approached her angrily. She said: You will die one day, Zainab. You will not live forever.

-We are all going to die.

She whispered to her, in a tone of weakness and brokenness, and said: Not me, I have been cursed forever. What will happen to me after your death?!

-What do you mean?

She left without answering her, not wanting clarification, and would never agree to have children, at least not now.

But not Zaynab.

Tonight, she is at the peak of ovulation, the ideal time to conceive; Hatshepsut leads her away from Hassan, “You will not sleep with him tonight, for a whole week, I will not allow anything wrong to happen that causes pregnancy.”

-Nothing will go wrong, trust me.

– The last time you said this, and you couldn’t control the situation, he almost did it, and we almost carried his child for this mistake!

-It won’t happen today, he misses me, and so do I, I promise you, I won’t allow it.

Finally, after minutes of heated discussion in a side room, Hatshepsut agreed, on the condition that Zainab let her control the situation completely,

“You will dance for him, arouse him, satisfy his lust, but he is forbidden to practice the full sexual process. In the last moments, you will let him enjoy himself anywhere on her body as long as you cannot be impregnated by him.”

However, Zainab made her decision beforehand, “he will do it, and I will carry a child from him in my womb. You will not prevent me today.”

When Zainab’s pregnancy was confirmed after a month, Hatshepsut lost her mind and tried to convince her to abort the fetus, but she resisted, saying, “I will not deprive him, and myself, of this child, even you.” She was convinced that Hatshepsut would love the child.

For the months that followed, she did not calm down, playing with her mind. The fetus must be removed, and then she soon surrendered to the fait accompli, as the pregnancy exceeded its first months, and getting rid of it became a danger to Zainab’s life.

Her face is like the moon, like her grandmother Karima.

With these words, the maid gave Hasan the good news of the arrival of his first child.

They decided to name her Qamar, which means “moon” in Arabic because she is truly an enlightening moon, which illuminated their life and made it more beautiful.

But not the life of Hatshepsut!

Which will not calm down unless she gets rid of her.