Chapter XXXVI. Love in the Midst of Hell

Years have passed in this manner; all you need to do is touch it to let lava run in your face. Life is nothing but torment encased in a shell of happiness.

The kind and devoted father passed away, and the two children—pardon me—but the four children have grown into responsible young men.

Marwan is a first-year student at a university studying in physics in the Faculty of Science. He is highly smart, and he has a bright future in astronomy.

Nubia, a high school student, is counting the days longing to be with him at the university.

Alara’s madness is growing and she is becoming more violent as she ages, but she no longer has the same control over them as she once had.

Unlike when they were younger, the two kids have grown up, making it harder to beat or discipline them.

What matters most is that they have a lot of experience dealing with her, her insanity, how to behave around her and when they need to flee from her.

All of her angry outbursts and attempts to incite their irrational behavior did not provide the anticipated effects for her. The two’s nerves grew as if they were frozen in a refrigerator and nothing on earth could rouse them.

Strangely enough, everything they experienced in their childhood seemed so fruitful that Alara could not destroy them, but rather trained them, made them exceptional, unexpectedly.

They had complete freedom to come and go as they pleased from the house. More specifically, Nubia was free to go and come whenever she pleased, so long as Marwan came along.

There are no human conditions other than the condition of love, hence neither the mother’s conditions nor even Marwan’s conditions apply.

The two realized they were intended to be together forever as the days and years went by.

They were connected by a further tie—the tie of love, even in hell.

The characters they developed, not only Baibars and Solmaz but every single character they ever made, also grew up with them.

Amazingly, they were able to portray characters as though they were two professional, international actors.

After school, Solmaz used to go see him at the nearby university. She waits for him in the garden until he finishes his lecture; when he sees her outside, he runs to her and they sit together before heading back home, at times late, after a tour of the markets and gardens, lunch in a restaurant, a cup of coffee in a café, or watching a movie. Of course, they also talk about any new developments in spy, thriller, and mystery stories.

She developed a fascination for physics, astronomy, galaxies, and the huge universe as a result of what he told her about all he studies at university.

Having a romantic daydream, she once told him: “One day, we will fly together, my hand in your hand, among the stars and planets, we will discover new worlds, and we will live to infinity, only you and I, no one else but us. I do not want to live without you; this is my heart’s decision; it will not permit me to be away from you, for the whole world without your presence is nothing but lost.”

He claimed that since the entire universe is contained within each of us, there is no need for us to travel to other planets to find new worlds. Instead, all we need to do is learn more about ourselves. He promised that since we have plenty of time and nothing will stand between us and discovering each other, nothing will stop me from doing so. I will always love you and be by your side, Solmaz, and I will do everything in my power to keep you safe.

She enjoyed disguising herself as a man on occasion, with graceful, gentle features and a gentle body. Her breasts were small and undetectable under a wide men’s shirt, loose jeans, a hat that concealed her soft hair like silk, which she had cut especially for this purpose, black glasses, an artificial beard and mustache, and makeup that covered up the luster of her face. She observes him from a distance while attempting to satisfy women’s natural curiosity about the treason; Maybe he even chats with one of them or sneaks a glance.

-You can fool everyone, Solmaz, except Baibars, said a voice from behind her.

She whirled around and gave him a scathing glare.

-You still look lovely, even having a thick mustache, he continued.

Lord! What’s wrong with Marwan?

Look what he’s doing there! Has he gone insane? A devilish touch, perhaps!

-People stare oddly at us, Baibars.

-I don’t give a damn about their opinions because you are the center of my existence and the center of my world.

a young man who is wealthy, attractive, clever, and tall.

Many admirers surround him; perhaps he would have been one with of us if not for his arrogance and isolation; he appears content with women, he does not desire any relationships; the gate of his heart guards an eternal love story.

This is what some girls claimed, but they have no idea that this love story contains a lot of agony, pain, and torment and that without it, none of this would have happened, resulting in the birth of one soul in two bodies.

Jealousy is not limited to women, although men’s jealousy takes on diverse forms.

How many times has he purposefully spilled his cup of coffee on someone’s shirt, ostensibly as a consequence of an unintentional fall just to impress Solmaz?

“She is mine,” his tongue murmurs, “and I am hers.” Be cautious of peeping, and who are you? What do know about me and her, about the challenges we overcame together, never do what you did.

As usual, she loved making him jealous at times, quarrelsome, curious.

-Baibars, a while ago one of them spoke to me. I was walking when I heard him say to his friend, “Look at her, oh, how beautiful she is.” Then he issued a strange sigh, full of lust.

-Where is he?! Where is he sitting?!

-He was there, I don’t know where he went.

And if she wanted to provoke his madness to its fullest extent.

-Baibars, oh my God, I was about to die of fright, someone said an obscene word to me a while ago!

His face turns red, the blood of anger flows, oh if he were still there where he was, if only you remember what he looks like, from here, let’s look there, perhaps you will recognize him.

Dozens of young men come and go, she was never able to recognize any of these shameless people, who hurled tender, poetic, and sometimes even obscene words to her.

If she sensed an external threat approaching, she purposefully moved toward him so that her body would cling to his.

Every time they walked together; he gripped her hand on purpose.

They wanted to convey the message, “Gentlemen, she is mine, and I am hers, my second half, and I am her half,” that they were more than simply passing friends or distant relatives brought together by circumstance.

Alara is not naive; she is fully aware of what is happening behind her back. She openly mocked her and made advice to her, such as that Marwan, a young teenager, would amuse her for a while before moving on to another girl.

She repeatedly told a passing guest that she wanted to marry off her son to a girl who had family and honor, who had been raised among her brothers, in the arms of her father and mother, and had learned from them. Her spirit of humiliation had reached such a point that she had criticized the girl for being an orphan.

She continually told him, “I don’t like her manners, this girl is malicious, maybe I made a mistake bringing her, and I didn’t know that she would be like this,” stirring up conflict between them on purpose. Then she makes an argument that she might be dating this person or that.

She then accuses him of lacking chivalry when he ignores her or won’t listen to what she has to say. You lack any manliness, damn you. You pursue an abnormal girl who manipulates you and then laughs vulgarly while she does so.

Alara will do everything it takes to get what she wants, including breaking them apart if necessary, questioning Nubia’s honor in front of him, and questioning his honor in front of Nubia.

If they hadn’t had a lot of experience with her, her previous attempts would have been successful. She tells lies. She doesn’t care about anything other than dividing us as she is the deity of sedition, who never stops fostering animosity and hate in everyone.

Since she could no longer beat and flog them as was the case in their childhood, she began to occupy herself with insulting them, and especially, Nubia.

She sneaks over to the girl’s room every night in the wee hours, puts her ear to the door to listen for sounds but never hears any, opens the door periodically to discover the girl asleep.

In the interim, she purposefully makes noise to get Nubia’s attention and rouse her from her sleep.

-What’s wrong, Aunty?

She looks at her suspiciously, without saying a word, and close the door.

Then she goes to Marwan’s room, makes sure that he is in his room, and then leaves.

She intended to say, “You are an abnormal girl; I fear for Marwan from you. Perhaps you will lure him into your room one day so that he will fall into a prepared trap, and he will be involved in bonding with you forever.”

One night, Marwan was nowhere in the house, she ran recklessly to Nubia’s room, opened the door, almost took it off, wanted to prove something that she was too tired to prove, then started shamelessly searching in the closet and under the bed.

Nubia jumped startled: What happened, aunt! What is wrong with you?!

-Where is Marwan?

-What? What is the relationship between the closet and Marwan?

Moments later he entered the door of the house, he was outside.

Mother: Where have you been?

-I met my classmate at the university, on the street in front of the building door, he gave me some papers.

-After midnight?

-Yes, and what’s the problem? He was checking his lessons in a nearby café.

His problem with the mother ended, but of course it did not end with Nubia, since he entered the house, and she looked at him like a wild beast, about to attack him and cut him with his fangs, not only because of what the aunt did to her but for another matter as well.

The next day, she did not go to the university, he searched for her in the cafe where they used to sit, but he did not find her, he returned home, and Nubia was sitting in her room.

-What’s wrong, Solmaz? You didn’t come today.

She raised her eyebrow, looked at him from top to bottom, sarcastically, and said: No need to disturb you, surely you needed some time with your friend away from me, the one who sneaks like thieves out of the house at night to meet her.

She added, pointing her hand at him to leave the room: There is no need to go out in the middle of the night, you can meet her at the university as often as you like.

That night, he did not leave his mobile phone in his hand, until the morning, writing to her, swearing that he was his classmate at the university, dozens of consecutive messages, then after a full hour, she replied to him.

-Don’t lie, who is she? Nisreen? Maison? Abeer? Maybe Zeina, they are all peeking at you, don’t think I’m stupid and I don’t know what’s going on around me.

Then a barrage of messages starts hitting her phone.

-my colleague, O Lord, O World, I swear by everything he’s my colleague.

if her phone stops ringing for just a few minutes in a row!

Send one brief message.

-What do you do? Do you talk to her?

She put the phone down and it starts ringing, a barrage of messages, most of them repeated.

Two days later, she decided to forgive him

-I will forgive you for your betrayal, on a promise not to repeat it.

-What betrayal are you talking about?!

Then a barrage of messages.

Baibars: Why won’t you listen to me? When my colleague spoke to me, my mum was awake. I let her know. I told her. I said that I will return after a short absence. The only thing she said was that she had heard me. I’m positive of it. I did it as soon as I left the house.

She wanted to make the customary insults to us and, more importantly, to let you know that I left the house so late.

And here she is, two days later, still implying that I was outside the home with a female and attempting to arouse resentment between us. This is just how she is; she cannot stand to see two people who are in love with each other reconciled.

Solmaz: Nothing has changed, and I want to go to bed.

A new message: Marwan, my brother, good night.

-My brother? Marwan? What does this mean exactly?

He went crazy, it is past midnight, she’s manipulating, this conversation must be conducted face to face, he threw the phone aside, tiptoeing, without making any noise, slowly opening the door to her room, as soon as she felt the door, she quickly turned her back on it.

She covered her body and tucked the phone under the pillow, closed her eyes, sure Aunt Alara, she doesn’t have to see me awake so late.

He walked over to her, put his hand on her shoulder, and gave her a handshake. In shock, her eyes widened. Her aunt wasn’t used to acting in this manner. With her heart nearly bursting with fear, she rushed out from under the cover.

Still standing, he looked up, the horror of what he saw nearly causing his heart to burst open.

She is dressed in a black shirt with red spots that is unusually wide and loose, has short sleeves, an open chest, and covers the top of her body up to the middle of her thighs. The collar is also exaggeratedly shifted to the right to fully expose her right shoulder and a portion of her right breast.

-Is this the shirt I misplaced a month ago?

He sighed and furrowed his brows.

She threw herself onto the bed after noticing that she is half-naked, covered herself with the sheet, and then stood at the other end.

-It caught my eye. That is my shirt. It serves no purpose to dispute it.

-Are you seriously thinking that I covered my body for this?

He looked at the door, then at her, in an undertone: If my mother should happen to come out of her room now on the night shift, our scandal would be all over the news tomorrow.

-Go, please; she might actually come, she thought as she checked the hallway.

-My brother Marwan? What did you mean by that?

-I swear to you that I was only making fun of you since I already knew how malicious my aunt was.

I’ve been looking for it for a month; it is my favorite, he whispered as he turned his back on the door and turned to face her.

Reconciliation or forgiving one another is not required. She stole his shirt from him and is wearing it to bed.

She was wearing it while she was berating him and infuriating him over the phone. She didn’t feel enraged. His genuineness was known to her. In addition to maybe punishing him, she wanted to agitate him; “Please let me know ahead of time if you plan to leave again that evening.”

The red lines have been crossed this evening.

For the first time in his life, he saw her half-naked.

The most important part is that she never chastised him for doing this!

She didn’t even become upset; she didn’t even respond in a way that suggested he was going too far.

He appeared to have broken into her room without her permission, and when he discovered her half-naked, it was nothing out of the usual.

It didn’t appear that he had committed an act for which he was not authorized.

He entered her room the following night, knowing he was coming early as he got permission over the phone first. He also knew that no additional checks would take place before dawn.

As soon as he entered the room, he took both hers and his first kiss from her lips.

Then kissing for 30 minutes.

Or maybe not quite; A kiss, a glance toward the door, a follow-up kiss, and then eavesdropping.

-Have you heard anything? she seems to be approaching!

He approaches the door, and leans against it, but hears nothing. He then turns around and steals a couple more kisses.

We don’t need to take any more risks; perhaps she’ll show up right now.

He abandoned her on the bed with his treacherously torn shirt still on.

Just as he entered his room, a barrage of ringing and a downpour of letters began.

You filthy thing, screw you. You misled me; how did I allow myself to act in this way toward you? I won’t forgive you since you toyed with my head and forced me to make the decision I did. Did you take away my purpose?

This is my final message to you; after today, I don’t want to speak to you or even look at your face. I will never forgive you as long as I live. How did you manage to trick me?

He read the messages, smiled overconfidently, and without replying a single letter, threw the phone aside and went back to her room.

Then a full hour of kisses and discovery of bodies.

He knows her very well. This waterfall of letters and insults was nothing more than an invitation to return. So are women, especially Solmaz.

Despite the fact that he is aware of her nature, she can still enrage and incite jealousy in him whenever she wants. She has a thorough understanding of him and is skilled at playing on his emotions.

Despite Alara being there, they are at their best.

They learn how to make her presence a source of pleasure and joy rather than misery and suffering.

The mice would sneak out as soon as the cat entered his chamber as they played and laughed every night and tricked Alara.

There was nowhere else in the home for them to kiss but in the closet, beneath the bed, and underneath the table, along with some extras of course.

Such connections and this affection must last forever since they never cease.

One night, as she sat on his lap, he held her in his arms, one hand on top of the other. He then removed one hand, stretched it behind his back, then took it back and raised it directly in front of her eyes.

-My darling, nothing will ever keep us apart. Will you marry me?

She grinned as she regarded the ring and then turned to face him, saying, “Yes.”

Since what binds them is stronger than the link of marriage and any other bonds, the additional bond that brought them together had no bearing on or effect on their relationship.

Engagement would not have improved the relationship, nor would its absence have made it worse.

As each of them now wears rings signaling our relationship’s official status, it is nonetheless a sort of protocol.

The rings did all the talking.

They agreed not to wear it while the mother was there, but they told everyone else.

When we finish our university studies and the time for marriage arrives, she will know about it even if they won’t disclose anything to her.

… if she survived that long!

Alara got sick unexpectedly.

A woman who does not become weary, break, conquer, calm down, or soften.

Overnight, she got confined to her bed.

The woman whose influence over nothing on earth is now sick with illness!

She wasn’t even close to being godlike.

Apparently, death loves this family!

It does not give them much time in life, not even enough opportunity to say goodbye to friends before leaving.

At about the same age as her brother Fouad, forty-nine, Alara breathed her last, as a result of an incurable disease that killed her suddenly, without warning.

She ultimately admitted to a young guy of twenty and a young woman of eighteen when she was dying.

For the first time in her life, she sobs sincere tears rather than crocodile ones, pleading with her children to forgive her for torturing and wronging them since they were young.

She exhaled a final breath before continuing, “If I have the right to leave a will as mothers, then my will is that you remain united for as long as you live.” Nothing has ever kept you apart, and it never will.

Be together, and keep Alara, the one who was kind and empathetic, only in your mind. Forgive me for what I did.

She spoke to Nubia with a breath of death and tears streaming from her eyes, saying, “If I had one last wish in this world, it would be to see that ring on your hand. Put it on my daughter. I always knew about it. I would be proud of you. There is no need to hide it any longer.”

She put the ring on her finger, pulled it out of her purse, and extended out her hand. Both Marwan and Alara touched the ring. He put on his ring after pulling it out of his pocket.

Nubia weeps; if death occurs, it expels all regrets and resentments, thus there is no terror comparable to its fear.

She expressed the wish that her aunt would pass away peacefully.

-My aunt, you didn’t hurt us; instead, you raised us till we grew into strong young men. We owe you a great deal of gratitude for all that you did for us, and even if you ever meant to hurt me, I forgive you for it.

Marwan is on the other side of the bed, holding her hand with one and groping her face with the other.

-No one is angry with you, Mama, in fact, what you think was cruelty to us, that is what refined us, made us what we are, we became exceptional beyond ordinary. As long as we are proud, happy with our reality and our situation, then this means that you have succeeded, you have made me a mature man who is indomitable by difficulties, and how proud we are of you.

She was a cruel, powerful, and oppressive dictator, but her absence will unavoidably create a void!

Where would we be without Alara?

They were perplexed by the query, “Can we live in peace now?”

that easy! No difficulties, torture, or torment!

Her passing put an end to everything.

Alara passed away, and possibly Hatshepsut did too!

According to what the two think, Zainab’s curse is finally ended.

Both of them forgot that whoever grew up on something got used to it, and that those who have grown accustomed to living in storms of confusion, conflict, and anxiety will never accept living in peace and then dying as if nothing ever occurred.